If Dreams Came True

There would be a lake in our house
The cellar door would lead to a coal mine
and the attic would be a shopping mall

If dreams came true
Sheila would be hot for me
but we wouldn’t be able to find any privacy
People would keep interrupting us
So we’d never be able to do it

If dreams came true
I’d be running down a hill
that gets steeper and steeper
until my feet no longer touch the ground
and I’d be falling

If dreams came true
I’d forget to put on my pants
and go to work in my underwear
Everyone would look at me disapprovingly
but no one would say anything
and I’d be embarrassed

If dreams came true
it would be a nightmare.